O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
