Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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