I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Randomize
