You work out of a Hotel?
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Randomize
