Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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