we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
