There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
