I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
