I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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