I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Randomize
