Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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