So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
