Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
