what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
