I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
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