I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
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