Porn is love you can see.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize