I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Randomize
