i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Randomize
