Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Randomize
