just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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