i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
this just has baby written all over it
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize
