yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
