So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Randomize
