Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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