Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
