I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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