and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
