You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
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