butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
not ubering you a puppy
Randomize
