you have to choose: penises or morals?
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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