Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
