I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
