is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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