I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Randomize
