i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
