I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Randomize
