Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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