I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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