just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
i need some magic done to my vagina
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Randomize
