How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I'm getting married
To pizza
I am available for nakedness
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
