Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Randomize
