I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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