My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
they're like a gay fantastic four
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
