Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Randomize
