Having a random hookup so left but love u
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
