i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
