oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
