woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
