No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
do herpes really smell.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Randomize